Hey, Lloyd, I'm ready to be heartbroken.

You know I have a big test to study for when I decide to sit down and write a proper blog entry instead of study. Gosh.

I don't have a lot to say - I feel like I never have anything to say anymore. I'm getting sick of high school. I'm ready for life to start. I think everybody is ready for their lives to start. People in my grade are nicer this year, I think. Nicer in general. Not that they were ever not nice, but suddenly it's like everybody has bigger things to think about. It's like everybody knows enough of their own pressure and stress to know that it's hardly worth it to pretend like you're better than anybody else. We're all in the same, scary boat and we need each other.

I have oil paint under my fingernails and in my hair. It took nearly three years, but I have finally figured out this painting business. I am no longer at the mercy of the oils. I am the boss of them now, and not the other way around, and that's a pretty cool thing. Right now I'm working on what's probably the most challenging painting I've ever had to do, and I'm almost finished and it's good and I can say that because I've done more than enough really crappy ones to know the difference. I'm proud of it. I'm proud of me for doing it. I've learned things and I like that. I like that I can see it, and I don't think that's a self-important thing to say. I think sometimes it's just a nice thing to be able to know for yourself.

Thie growing up business is so much bigger than anything anyone has ever warned me about.