Sunday, August 17, 2003

I watched Urban Legends about half an hour ago. It's a little after 1^AM and I keep expecting to turn around and come face to face with a dude in a hooded parka ready to chop me into human salad with his axe. [yeah, Matt, I know - I'm stealing the things I wrote to you in your e-mail and using them in my blog. Original thought hasn't come to easily lately. Hahaha.]

I have a headache.

I know that somewhere inside me there's something I've got to say but I can't exactly figure out what it is. Does that make sense? Probably not. But it's like I'm finally feeling something [other than the panic over my library incident] and all it is is this enormous frustration over not being able to figure out what's going on inside my head. I don't even know where to start. I have to start somewhere if I'm going to make any sense out of anything at all but where to begin? I'm afraid that once I start I won't be able to stop, I won't know when I've reached the end, even. I might just sit there creating more and more things for me to worry about and cry over and maybe they won't even be real things but they'll be there and I won't be able to tell the difference because if I don't know what exactly it is that's bothering me, how am I supposed to know what it isn't? There is so much that I know I have to say and there are so many reasons for me not to say anything at all.

Hailey spazzed at 1:24:00 a.m.

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